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TEMPLATE TUTORIAL

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Ready to write to someone who understands grief?

(because she's living it too)

You don't have to do this alone.

Letters After Loss is a pen pal membership for women

who have lost a spouse or partner.

SCROLL to learn more

If you're reading this...

You already know what grief feels like at 7pm on a Wednesday when the house is quiet and everyone else's life seems to have carried on.

✴

You know what it's like to be surrounded by people who love you and yet you still feel completely and utterly alone.

✴

You know the particular loneliness of losing a partner, your person . Because the person you would normally turn to when things are hard is the person who is gone.

✴

And you probably know what it feels like when people slowly stop saying their name.

I know all of this because I've lived it.

And I built Letters After Loss because of it.

if you've been feeling like ...

No one truly understands what you’re going through, no matter how kind their words are.

The loneliness is heavy, and you miss having someone who just gets it.

You want to talk about your spouse / partner, your memories, and your grief, but you’re not sure who to share it with anymore.

✴ Are you ready to take one small step towards feeling less alone, even on the days when everything feels impossible ✴

then Imagine if...

You had a safe, understanding space where you could connect with another widow who truly understands.

You looked forward to receiving a handwritten letter in the post, written just for you.

You felt part of a gentle, supportive community, coming together each month to try something new and find moments of lightness again.

"I come from the pre social media world and had many pen-pals in my teenage years, getting to know someone via letters was always something that I enjoyed back then . The idea of Letters After Loss interested me as I know how hard it can be to find people who truly understand the place we find ourselves. It can also be a very lonely place sometimes. The idea of writing and sharing appeals to me . I would have been concerned about sharing address ect , but having a middle (wo)man takes that concern away. I really enjoyed writing my letter and it was a lovely feeling when I received one . I would recommend this , if you enjoy writing and learning about others and maybe make a new friend then this could be for you"

— Wendy

Receiving my first pen pal letter was far more meaningful than I expected. It arrived at a time when I felt isolated in my grief, and reading words from someone who genuinely understood what I was going through brought a real sense of comfort. There was no judgement—just a real connection with a person who had walked a similar path and could relate to the emotions I was trying to navigate. Their letter made me feel seen and understood in a way that’s hard to find in everyday conversations. Having a bereavement pen pal has given me a safe space to express my feelings and reflect on my loss, while also hearing someone else’s story. It’s been grounding, healing, and unexpectedly uplifting. I would highly recommend this to anyone who feels alone in their grief or struggles to talk openly with people around them. Sometimes the quiet empathy from a stranger can make all the difference.

— sharon

I was excited at the prospect of connecting via letter but I was concerned about what to include in my first letter, I went for a simple introduction of who I was and what I enjoyed and was relieved when this was what my pen pal had also gone with in her first letter. Receiving her letter was a glimmer of brightness amongst the bills and mundane post I normally receive. My second letter was much easier to write as I feel like I already know her. I would definitely recommend connecting with a pen pal as I find it provides a relaxed and predictable connection in a time of uncertainty and the joy of seeing that hand written envelope land behind your door knowing it’s from your friend is indescribable.

— CLAIRE

“I just wanted to say thank you for setting up this pen pal club. The timing was just so great as I had recently started pen- paling but to 'non-widows'. This just feels that little bit more special.

— Fran

“What a great idea! Thank you so much for setting this up”

— Tyra

INTRODUCING

THE LETTERS AFTER LOSS

PEN PAL MEMBERSHIP

A community for women navigating life after losing a partner of a spouse.

You want to talk about your person without worrying you're saying too much or making others uncomfortable
You want to find connection and friendship without having to leave your home or step too far outside your comfort zone
You believe in the power of something handwritten, personal, and slow in a world that moves too fast

Are you ready to take one small step towards feeling less alone?

1 Monthly Handwritten Letters

Every month you'll write a letter to your pen pal and receive one in return.

Real letters, on real paper, through the post.

Something to hold in your hands from someone who truly understands.

Your home address is never shared, all letters travel through our secure PO Box system

2 Monthly Newsletter

3 Monthly Online Community Events

Each month we come together online to try something new - wine tasting, drawing classes, meditation, flower arranging, and more.

Cameras on or cameras off, entirely up to you.

This isn't about fixing grief.

It's about not doing it alone. All from the safety of your own home.

✴ So What Is Letters After Loss ✴

Write And Receive Handwritten Letters

Every month you write to your pen pal. Every month a letter arrives through your door from someone who understands — not because she's read about grief, but because she is living it too.

Friendships Formed

You are personally matched by me (Caroline) with a pen pal whose experience reflects yours. And you continue writing to each other for as long as you both wish. My hope is that from those first letters, real friendships grow.

Membership Community

Letters After Loss is a membership community for women who have lost a spouse or partner. Connected through handwritten letters, sent monthly, through a completely safe and private postal system.

This is a community where you don't have to explain anything. Where you can say their name. Where you can be exactly where you are in your grief without apology.

JOIN US TODAY

You found Letters After Loss for a reason.

Maybe you're in the thick of the first year and you need someone who understands. Maybe you're further along and the loneliness has crept back in ways you didn't expect. Maybe you just want someone to write to, someone who gets it without you having to explain.

Whatever brought you here, you are so welcome. This community was built for you.

There are a limited number of founding member places remaining at £15 a month. After the first 100 women join, the price rises to £18. Once you're in at the founding price, it's yours forever.

Founding member

£15/month

Special price for founding members (only 100 places available)
Personally matched with a pen pal
Handwritten letters sent and received each month
Secure PO Box address so your home address is never shared
Monthly newsletter

JOIN TODAY

"Healing doesn't happen all at once.

It happens one small act at a time. This could be yours."

Letters After Loss is brand new. And the women who join first (the Founding Members) will always hold a special place in this community.

You are taking a chance on something that is just beginning. You are helping to build something that will go on to help hundreds of women feel less alone. That means something to me and I want to honour it.

This is why founding members pay £15 a month - and that price is locked in forever. No matter how the membership grows or how the price changes for new members, your £15 stays exactly as it is for as long as you remain a member.

After the first 100 founding members, the price rises to £18 a month.

founding member

(only 100 places available)

£15/month

Special price for founding members (only 100 places available)
Personally matched with a pen pal
Handwritten letters sent and received each month
Secure PO Box address so your home address is never shared
Monthly newsletter
Monthly online member events

Standard member

(after first 100 members)

£18/month

Personally matched with a pen pal
Handwritten letters sent and received each month
Secure PO Box address so your home address is never shared
Monthly newsletter
Monthly online member events

Your Safety Matters

When you lose your person, a particular vulnerability comes with it.

I've thought carefully about that in building every part of Letters After Loss.

Let me tell you exactly how we keep you safe:

Your home address is never shared with anyone. Not your pen pal, not other members, not anyone. All letters are sent to our PO Box address, where I sort and redirect them personally.
When you join you are given a unique ID number. This, along with your first name, is the only information your pen pal ever sees.
There is no public Facebook group where personal profiles are visible. Outside of the monthly Zoom events, everything happens offline. Just letters, between you and your pen pal.
Every member is a woman who has lost a spouse or partner. This is a closed, trusted community of women who understand each other.

I want you to feel completely safe here.

Because you deserve a space where you can be open and honest without any worry.

TRY IT RISK FREE

100% Money Back Guarantee

If within the first month you change your mind that is not a problem. Just let us know and we will refund your first month's membership fee.

Hi lovely,

I'm Caroline

Six months before Paul died, I turned 50. We had a bucket list. We ate fish and chips in Whitby, went ten pin bowling, and took our last family holiday to Greece, a trip Paul had insisted he would hate and then never stopped talking about.

Three weeks after he was diagnosed, he was gone.

I went from being a we to being a me overnight.

From a family of four to a family of three.

And I had absolutely no idea how to survive it.

Some days survival meant nothing more than remembering to feed my children. My daughter survived entire days on porridge. The grief was that consuming.

What I didn't expect was how lonely it would be. Not just the sadness, the loneliness. The way friends didn't know what to say. The way Paul slowly stopped coming up in conversation. The way I was expected to be getting better when I was still just getting through.

One day I posted in a widow Facebook group asking if anyone would like to be my pen pal. A woman replied. We started writing to each other.

"Paul is quite literally my favourite topic of conversation. Not talking about him hurts more than talking about him ever could."

The first time I received her letter I realised something I hadn't been able to articulate before, I wasn't the only one. There was someone on the other end of this handwritten letter who understood completely. Who didn't need me to explain. Who was on the same road, just a few steps ahead or behind.

That feeling is what Letters After Loss is built on.

ARE YOU READY?

You found this page for a reason.

Maybe you're not sure you're ready. Maybe you've been telling yourself you'll join when things feel a little easier. But grief doesn't work like that and waiting for the right moment means spending more time alone than you need to.

This is the right moment. You are ready enough.

Founding membership is open now at £15 a month and locked in forever, for the women brave enough to join first. After 100 members the price rises to £18. There are a limited number of places remaining.

The woman on the other end of your first letter is waiting.

GOT MORE QUESTIONS?

You can email me at [email protected] if you have any questions, I'm happy to help! And don't forget to check out the FAQs below; there's a ton of helpful info waiting for you.

What if I don't know what to write?

You don't need to. There are no rules about what goes in your letter. You can write about your person, about your day, about something that made you smile or something that broke your heart. Your monthly newsletter includes letter writing prompts and ideas for when you feel stuck. And your pen pal isn't expecting perfection, she's expecting honesty. That's all.

How long does it take to be matched with a pen pal?

I make every match personally and carefully so it isn't instant. I aim to have every new member matched within two weeks of joining. You'll receive an email introducing you to your pen pal with everything you need to write your first letter.

How do you match me with my pen pal

You won't be matched by an algorithm. I read every member profile and make each match personally, thoughtfully, and carefully. Because this matters too much to be left to a computer.

What if I don't get on with my pen pal?

It happens, and that's completely okay. Just get in touch with me and I will rematch you. No questions asked, no awkwardness. Your comfort and happiness in this community is the most important thing.

What if my pen pal stops writing?

If a pen pal goes quiet I will always reach out to find out why. Sometimes life gets in the way and a gentle nudge is all that's needed. If a pen pal leaves the membership I will rematch you as quickly as possible so you're never left without someone to write to.

Is my personal information safe?

Completely. Your home address is never shared with anyone. All letters travel through our PO Box address and are redirected by me personally. Your pen pal only ever knows your first name and your unique member ID. There is no public community where your details are visible.

Do I have to attend the online events?

Not at all. They are completely optional. They're there for when you want them. The aim of the online events is to have fun, and try something new from the comfort of your own home. Cameras on or cameras off is always your choice. There is no pressure to show up to do anything you don't feel ready for.

Can I cancel at any time?

Yes, you can cancel your membership at any time with no penalty. If you cancel and then decide to rejoin, please be aware that the founding member price may no longer be available and you would rejoin at the current rate.

Is this a therapy or counselling service?

No, and it's important to be clear about that. Letters After Loss is a community, not a therapeutic service. I have no background in counselling or therapy. What I do have is lived experience of widowhood and a genuine belief that human connection is one of the most powerful things there is. If you are struggling with your mental health please do reach out to a professional. Letters After Loss can exist alongside that support, not instead of it.

I'm not very good at writing. Does that matter?

Not even slightly. Your pen pal isn't looking for beautiful prose. She's looking for connection. Write the way you speak. Write the way you'd tell a friend. That's more than enough.